Life is full of moments of guilt and worry, two emotions that most of the time only serve to distract us from the present moment. We feel guilty about what we do and we worry about what we can do, thus forgetting about the present.
Two erroneous areas: guilt and concern
Guilt and worry are part of our erroneous areas and, although they are two different emotions, we can actually situate them at the ends of the same line. When we blame ourselves for something, we do not exploit the present because we are immobilized by what has happened in the past, and when we worry, we immobilize ourselves for something that is in the future and over which we usually have no control. Both emotions therefore coincide with a stillness in the present.
Remorse for something that has happened in the past and fear for what may happen in the future are what normally makes us freak out in everyday life. The world is full of people who are sick of something they shouldn’t have done or who are scared of things that may come with time. Maybe we are not an exception either.
Society continually sends us messages of guilt and concern; having grown up in this way, we see such emotions as something normal in our lives. However, how does this happen? Someone sends a message to remind us that we have been bad people for something we have done or that we have not done, felt or not heard, said or not said. Then in response we feel bad or uncomfortable in the present. So we turn into guilt machines. Guilt can become one of the most useless emotions, know it. We waste a lot of our energy feeling guilty of something that has happened in our past and we immobilize ourselves for something that is now out of date. There is nothing we can do to change what happened.
We must be able to differentiate between guilt and learning from mistakes. As previously mentioned, the fault is the immobility of the present which can range from a small malaise to the most serious depression. It prevents us from acting in the present because we do this first. In this state, we waste our energies on something that has already happened, thus proving useless and harmful to ourselves. There is no guilt so great that it can solve or change a problem. However, learning from the past, unlike guilt, involves avoiding repeating certain behaviors with the intention of learning from our mistakes without immobilizing us. Learning from mistakes is a healthy and necessary process for our growth and personal development. It allows us to move forward.
As we have seen, guilt is a useless emotion that only serves to immobilize us and to lose the present, therefore trying to look at the past as something unchangeable can help us a lot. Any guilt won’t help solve the problem because we can’t change what has been. Imprint this message in your mind, add it to your usual repertoire of thoughts.
– Ask yourself what you avoid in the present because of the past. Thus, gradually you will eliminate the need to blame yourself.
– Start accepting the things you have chosen yourself, but they can annoy people. You need to accept yourself so that the guilt you feel for not getting the approval of others disappears.
– Start keeping a diary in which to report all those situations in which you felt guilty, writing that you are missing the present because you are distressing yourself for the past. This will allow you to deepen your guilt.
– Try to show the people you relate to and who try to manipulate you through the sense of guilt that you are able to deal with the disappointments caused by your behavior. The result will not come immediately, but the attitude of these people will change when they see that they cannot force you to feel guilty.
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